Most of our male readers won't really comprehend this, but the launch event for new posh shoes can be a big deal. A really big deal.

So when Harrods yesterday hosted a launch event for some ruby-sapphire-and-diamond-encrusted Rene Caovilla sandals (value - £62,000), they took security concerns a little bit more seriously than normal. Not for them a security guard in a cap borrowed from the nearest Asda. Instead they hire a live Egyptian Cobra to slither about a bit.

Yes, a live cobra.

There are apparently 30 different types of cobra, and we're unsure whether this one was especially venemous. Knowing the famous department store, the snake probably left the building having spent most of its monthly salary on nicknacks, a trip to the food court and a souvenir branded mug for its mum.

A spokeswoman for Harrods commented that no one should fear getting bitten "unless you're a burglar". So far, so cutesy. Harrods has never shied away from tacky PR stunts, but this one seems rather silly. A poisonous cobra would have to be kept under lock and key (imagine it escaping and terrorising Kensington - you can almost feel the property prices plummet) and so any security purpose is entirely fictitious.

To get real cut-through with this, may we humbly suggest something to Harrods PR department? Wrap the cobra around the Diana/Dodi shrine currently sat under the escalators. Now that would make a REAL photo opportunity. We've always thought that there was something missing in the 8-ft high 'sculpture' with Di and Dodi's photographs encrusted with seagulls atop a trickling waterfall, some shrubs and four 'everlasting candles'. Add in a hysterical Al Fayed getting bitten whilst rescuing his shrine from a snake attack and you've definitely bagged yourself some headlines.

Slithery image from scorius's Flickrstream.

Composer Alvin Curran and the London Symphony Orchestra will be performing Maritime Rites on the banks of the Thames outside Tate Modern and on a barge on the water itself this Friday evening. Described as a sound sculpture, Maritime Rites is a semi-improvised live event that incorporates the bells of St Pauls, the sound of traffic on the river and music associated with the Thames.

As if this piece of live music and site-specific performance wasn't extraordinary enough, the event is inviting Londoners to be part of it.

If you are interested and can play a portable acoustic instrument (one that does not need a chair), please contact the Maritime Rites team at Tate Modern.

We need to know the instrument you play, the length of time you have been playing it, and if you can attend a rehearsal the day before the performance. The rehearsal will take place at Tate Modern on the evening of 13 September 2007. You will also be asked to come in advance of the performance on 14 September 2007.

If you've got a horn, or can toot a flute or have a musical interest / musical skill that is adaptable for crude puns, get in touch! We'll be there to cheer you on as our musical contribution of paper and comb may not make it into the actual performance. It will be quite a marvel to witness the Thames being brought to life through sound, performed by professionals and professional Londoners.

Maritime Rites by Alvin Curran, the London Symphony Orchestra and volunteers with their own musical instruments, Friday 14 September, 5.30pm. The event is free and takes place on the Thames outside Tate Modern. For more information and to volunteer, go to the Maritime Rites website here.

Image courtesy of Simon Rigglesworth via the Londonist Flickr pool

The fifth in our series of interviews with potential candidates for next year's Mayoral election. Previously: Victoria Borwick (Tory), Andrew Boff (Tory) and Warwick Lightfoot (Tory), Sian Berry (Green).

Today: Liberal Democrat candidate Fiyaz Mughal. He's competing with fellow LDs Brian Paddick and Chamali Fernando to represent his party in next year's elections. Would you vote for him? Read his ideas below.

Where do you live in London and what do you like best about it?
I live in the London Borough of Haringey and enjoy the sheer diversity of London. There is no other capital city that is as vibrant as London and which has so many different communities within it. That is the strength of London and many cities look towards London as the beacon and trail blazer city from which social programmes can be adopted and implemented within their respective areas.

Why do you think you should be Mayor and what policies would you bring to the office that would make you stand out against anyone else who wants to be?
I think I should be Mayor since I bring with me a deep understanding of issues affecting Londoners and have been campaigning and working on social policy issues within the voluntary and community sector for nearly 12 years now. I have founded and developed not for profit organizations that have worked within numerous social fields. These have included areas like the provision of free generalist advice and information (I am currently the Chief Executive of the Enfield Citizens Advice Bureaux Service), financial exclusion and inclusion programmes with credit unions and community development finance initiatives, the educational sector and within organizations promoting integration and community cohesion within London. I believe that my work with a variety of communities shows that I am flexible and adaptable in my outlook and the London Mayor needs to have the vision and flexibility to deal with rapidly changing issues within the City.

I have experience as a Councillor and my grass roots activism has meant that I have an excellent grasp of what is taking place where it matters in London, within local communities! This allied with campaigning with diverse communities and allied to the political experience that I bring, makes me stand out against other candidates who have been hoisted onto the scene. (My political experience has involved being the Chair of the Ethnic Minority Liberal Democrats from 2002-2006, a Deputy President of the Liberal Democrats from 2006-7 and a member of the Party's Federal Policy Executive Committee, 2006-2008). My vision is based on promoting local solutions for local problems in London as opposed to the autocratic manner in which the current Mayor is driving through policies in London, (planning priorities for London are prime examples).

How do you yourself travel around London?
I use the tube on the majority of occasions and I occasionally use the car when necessary. My vehicle is a Peugeot 206 with an 1100cc engine. I think that better management needs to be implemented particularly in the administration of Metronet, which has been far from successful in delivering quick and efficient services.

What is your policy regarding irritant noise from mobile phone music players on the tube and buses?
I am afraid that I am against banning things since I am Libertarian at the very core. However, it is imperative on us as people who increasingly share the same living spaces, to ensure that we have respect for the needs and requirements of others. I think that the 'Me First' approach that developed under Thatcherism has taken away much from local communities who would normally work and gel together within a 'community spirit.' This item can also be tackled through an educational and sticker campaign that makes people think twice about putting their MP3's or mobile phone speakers on loud so that others are disturbed.

Would you have introduced the Congestion Charge and if not will you repeal it?
The answer is yes and I think that the Congestion Charge has been successful in reducing congestion in Central London. I remember the days prior to the Congestion Charge when it was difficult to get round London and where buses could not get through bus lanes or other points due to the sheer amount of vehicles in Central London, (as well as due to bad driving). London has become accessible and it has also helped reduce pollution and carbon emissions in the City. I think that another key point is that it has also helped to have an environmental impact and made people use public transport. Anything that does that is a positive thing!

Do you support the building of a new runway at Heathrow and how would you reduce your own international travel if you become Mayor?
This is a difficult question and one which needs to be put into context somewhat. Increased air travel is something that is a reality, though many flights do not fill to capacity even though they should in order to reduce the number of planes in the skies with extremely large carbon footprints. However, cheaper air flights (especially in the internal UK flight market) mean that more landing spaces are needed, more so in the crowded skies over Heathrow. Therefore, a new runaway is essential though I would like to see further airline taxes imposed and educational campaigns implemented around using other forms of transport to travel within the UK. Frankly, getting up earlier in the morning and a slightly longer travel time is a small price to pay for the rapid climate changes that we see around us. More and more, the climate of the globe is changing and there is significant evidence to confirm that this is due to global warming. If I were to become Mayor I would ensure that wherever possible, I would travel by train and by public transport. This would also include European international trips.

What would be your vision for the city by 2020 and how would you achieve it as Mayor?
? Significant business and financial incentives need to be put into place to reduce the CO2 emission levels on a yearly basis. The Mayor talks about a 4% year on year reduction in emission levels, so that emissions will be 60% below the 1990 levels in 2025. I propose that the business taxes be revised to take into account the heaviest polluters so that there is a financial incentive to try to reduce emissions. I think that 5% reductions year on year are possible through educational campaigns at a local and central government level allied to incentives as outlined.

? I would like to see greater transparency in the way that City Hall is run. By 2020, I hope to see Citizen's Recruitment Panels up and running in the recruitment of key posts like mayoral advisers. I am afraid to say that mayoral appointments have been made without due transparency and scrutiny of the process and this has to change. The public need to have confidence that they are receiving value for money and they should be involved in the recruitment processes in conjunction with key officers.

? I am afraid to say that in the rush for affordable homes, the Mayor has been involved in setting priorities for local areas without recourse to advise from local officers or elected councillors who know more about their local areas. The local infrastructure of some areas cannot cope with new high density housing developments and further stresses on community cohesion and resources are evident. However, affordable housing is required for a growing population and to re-house those within unsuitable living conditions; there is a difference though and to meet the demand the Mayor has suggested about 35,500 new homes per year until 2025. Such high benchmarks are causing problems in some areas and my vision is to ensure that at least 30,000 new homes are created with additional resources being targeted through lobbying to Central Government to help build up the local infrastructure. This is essential for future stability and for the well-being of local communities.

? London requires about 50,000 jobs per year and these can be brought into effect through additional volunteering opportunities in the capital that can help build skills and experience for those looking for employment. Sustainable social entrepreneurism post the Olympics should mean that some jobs should have a long life cycle and the effective business use of the Olympic sites for social and business functions will mean that there will be further opportunities. The London Development Agency will also be a key driver to the creation of new posts ? especially for those leaving school or further education colleges with vocational qualifications and many of these will be employed in new service and cultural industries. Many of these opportunities will come from the Olympics but they should not come at the expense of good causes ( i.e. through drains on the National Lottery pots of funding).

Do you have any London-based trivia our readers may not know?
Yes, it is interesting to note that up to January 2007, about 750,000 people from Eastern European Accession states had registered under the Worker Migrant Scheme to come to the UK (to work). 450,000 of these were Poles and many work in the informal economy in London. (A snippet of information I picked up today as I presented a report on Migrant Workers.)

Have you ever been sick on the tube?
Thankfully no! An interesting concept though and especially when it is crowded and not ventilated!

By 'Race4CityHall'.

One of Londonist?s fave websites is seat61.com. Now this is not because we are closet anoraks, or are forever secretly planning our escape from the capital ? it is just a damn fine website. Everything that you ever wanted to know about trains but were afraid to ask. Not just London, but worldwide. Journey to plan? We bet your travelling conundrums are already addressed on the man in seat 61?s site. It is a mammoth task, the work of a lifetime ? think Shakespeare, or the Pyramids - but somehow it has been accomplished, and by just one man in, well, not long at all actually.
We caught up with Mark Smith, internet star and train-spotter extraordinaire, to ask him a few questions?.

We imagine that you have been asked this question once or twice before?but why ?the man in seat 61??
I have to blame Eurostar. It?s my favourite first class seat, one of a pair of armchairs facing each other across a table with an unobstructed view from a picture window. Lovely! I?ve left London in Eurostar?s seat 61 for places as disparate as Marrakech, the Crimea, Damascus in Syria and even Tokyo via Vladivostok.

Did you want to be a train driver when you were a wee laddie? Have trains always fascinated you? And are you a trainspotter?
Drive the train? Heaven forbid! I?m much happier sitting back with a glass of red and letting someone else do all that! Travel?s the thing, trains and ships are easily the most interesting, comfortable and civilised way to go about it?

This Londonist has trouble managing a few paltry postings a week ? how on earth do you keep your site in order and hold down a real job as well? How long did it take to build the site?
Frankly, I don't know how I manage, either, with a full time job and helping bring up a very active one-year-old at home. But an hour and a half commute to London every day can be put to good use! I started seat61.com in 2001, and it?s grown and grown since then.

You must have a favourite London station? which is it and what makes it special?
It has to be Charing Cross, where I was station manager from 1990 to 95.
100 staff and 100,000 passengers a day, easily the most interesting and hassle-some job I've ever done! Dealing with royalty one minute, trains hitting buffers the next?

Do you think things will change much when Eurostar moves to St. Pancras? Is it a good thing?Suddenly, whole swathes of northern England will become closer to Paris and Brussels by train than they are by air, with one simple change at St Pancras. And there's more to come. Coupled with a new high-speed line due to open across Holland in a year or two, London to Amsterdam will become a relaxing and productive 4 hours 6 minutes by train. Given 2 hour check-ins, an hour flight and another hour wasted getting to and from the airports, high-speed trains could give the airlines something to think about on what is now one of the busiest air routes in Europe.

Do you like the Underground, or doesn?t it count as a real train?
I commute on it every day, and don't we all love a free sauna on the way to work? Still, it?s quintessentially London, where would we be without it?

Have you ever been sick on the Underground?
Nope, fortunately not.

Yes, "Got Mine Got Yours" is a bonafide, non-cringeworthy message to da kidz but also quite a bad (good) track in itself. If it wasn't for the persistent smoke alarm ring that pierces the chorus and makes you think your house is burning down and the point where he tries to promote his mySpace page but can't quite fit the words in, we'd be rooting this for the charts.

Controversy, AKA Stephen-remell Coleman, decided to join the Fire Brigade after seeing a fire safety awareness demonstration at school and describes it as his dream job. He's 28, became a firefighter 18 months ago and is currently in a development programme at Wimbledon Fire Station, where the video was shot. His colleagues, who feature in the video, are shy to admit they like the track but Controversy says,

The guys on my team don't do it in front of me but I've heard them humming it

The LFB will be publicising the track to big up smoke alarm ownership and the Brigade?s free home fire safety visits. Controversy, in the meantime, is recording an album - we just hope it's a public information one because we don't want to lose our Stephen to the dark side.

Londoners can call 08000 28 44 28 to arrange for a visit from local firefighters, who will chat to them about fire risks and fit free smoke alarms if they are needed. Find out more about Controversy at www.myspace.com/­controversyworld

Image courtesy of mag3737's Flickrstream.

Our Lord Ken's marketing team might like to think that we all speak with ONe voice but we certainly do so in many different tongues. And whilst celebrating our cultural diversity is one of London's proud boasts, it's turning into a bit of a pain in the arse for First Great Western who don't seem to know what to do with their signage at Southall.

Firstly they remove all the signs at the station (which are in English and Punjabi) because other ethnic groups had raised concerns about using only one non-English language. Today, they're ready to put them back up having upset the council with whom they'd agreed to use the multi-lingual signs 12 years ago.

We sense a shark filled tank of hot water approaching. What to do, what to do? Well yesterday FGW said they had consulted within the community and have decided to review the signage; deciding for now to adopt government guidelines requiring only English be used. Today they accept that wider community input was necessary and unfortunately the signs were taken down before that took place and (they) apologise for that. That'll be because everyone who liked the signs originally complained more vociferously than all those who complained about them in the first place.

So who'd like to be on the FGW board juggling this hot potato of political correctness right now? Do the old signs stay because as Ealing MP Virendra Sharma says, they acknowledge Southall's distinct character and its established Punjabi community, or can we truly talk of an integrated London whilst singling one community out over any other? Can cultural diversity exist without accepting the importance of one's own language or does cultural integration mean there has to be some common ground between us all. And communication is probably a good place as any to start. Still, if there's anything our history should have taught us by now it's that there's nothing more divisive than being different.

We look forward to seeing how this one pans out and can only hope that in ten years time we'll finally be living in the post-retro-future-noir world promised by the likes of Blade Runner and Minority Report where all the signs will automatically detect our nationality and display to us correctly in a language we understand.

Image taken from Brothergrimm's flickr photostream

We talk about festivals all the time here on Londonist: food festivals, theatre festivals, religious festivals, dance festivals... we can't help it. London is a festive place. The latest festival that we bring to you today is the London Design Festival, starting this Saturday and lasting for ten full days of talks, exhibitions, parties, books, magazines, tours, walks and... stuff.

This is the fifth year for the festival and it just keeps getting bigger and better - this year, there are over 200 projects taking part and whether you are in the trade, a design student or simply a dedicated follower of funky furniture, cool architecture and nicely put together things, there'll be something to see that suits you.

There's so much in the programme spread out over a massive area, the festival organisers have had to be creative and clever in mapping and planning different ways to get around everything listed. There's the MyFestival planner on the wesite for those who keep spotting things they want to see while online - just log in and compile your own itinerary. Otherwise, for those who fancy compiling their lists of things to see and do while on the hoof, the icon design trail is a little booklet published by icon magazine which is available at all participating venues. This free pocket-sized guide has maps, listings and information, split into West, East, Central and Other categories so you can do it all geographically. There's a particularly useful section at the back which lists all the best parties and private views, along with a handy Tube map. They know what they're doing, these design types.

Or... just turn up at the Truman Breweries (golly, that place has had a busy year so far...) for Tent London's occupation of the 11-acre site and see a bloody huge amount of stuff all in one go. This mega-design consultancy is hosting a range of exhibitions, each one with a different theme so it's like the whole London Design Festival in one place: go to Circa for vintage design, Content for furniture, lighting, materials and interiors, Talent Zone for new designers, Your Space for installations and micro-shows and the very cool Urbantine exhibition which is a showcase of what happened in the fast architecture competition.

London Design Festival, Saturday 15 to Tuesday 25 September. For more information and full festival programme, go to the festival website here.

Don't you love it when the fair comes to town? The lights, the candy floss, the 'hook a duck', the grenades, the rocket launchers, the assault rifles! Ahh, takes you back to childhood! Your father lifting you onto his shoulders, getting so full of sweets that you throw up after going on the dodgems, examining the latest in targeting technology, watching footage of fuel-air explosive destroying an Afghan town, feeling the reassuring weight of a tear gas cannon in your arms, or if you were lucky, having a go on a landmine.

But don't you hate it when you make a social faux-pas? Turning up to a party in fancy dress when everyone else is in their normal clothes, getting a bit drunk at a wedding and telling everyone about the time the groom got naked in Debenhams, or turning up at London's biennial Defence Systems and Equipment show fair and being sent home for selling leg irons.

The Guardian reports that two companies were told to leave the arms fair last night for "promoting leg irons for prisoners and battlefield captors" despite the fact that these items do not contravene the government's ban on the sale and export of equipment that can be used for repression and torture.

If they're not illegal, why aren't they allowed to be sold? It seems to be an issue of public perception - the government and the organizers of the fair have been trying to improve the image of the arms exhibition. The sale of leg irons is apparently "hugely embarrassing".

If they are embarrassing, why aren't they illegal? Also, why are they embarrassed by the sale of unpleasant-but-legal leg irons but not the fact that human rights blackholes Libya, Saudi Arabia, China, and Indonesia were invited. Or indeed the USA. We realize that there is a need for a defence industry but it is going to take more than dismissals like these for it to improve its image. Without getting too Brian Haw, the organizers have much more to be embarrassed about than leg irons - if we were to visit we doubt it would be a case of, "Oh, I thought it was such a lovely arms fair until I saw those nasty leg irons!".